Sunday, September 30, 2007

SUPERMAN IS DEAD: Tebow, Gators lose to Auburn (Somebody say Krytonite?)


Superman is dead.
Super sophomore Florida quarterback Tim Tebow played like the Man of Steel this year, but his cape was ripped from him and stomped on by the Auburn Tigers last night, who beat the Gators 23-20 in the Swamp.
That makes Tommy Tuberville Lex Luther, or somebody from the ancient planet of Superman's birth, Kryton. Either way it's a big W for the Tigers and a huge L for the Gators.
Florida played most of the game with a fat zero on the scoreboard before a second-half flurry tied it at 14 then they scored 3 more(only after Quentin Groves, the Tigers' best linebacker, was knocked out of the game with an injury).

Auburn's quarterback Brandon Cox was the game's biggest beneficiary: He actually played like a major college quarterback for a change. Auburn would need it. After they lost their big lead thanks to a bunch of long heaves by Tebow, Auburn recomposed itself and relentless, violently marched down the football field in field goal range.
Auburn true frosh kicker Wes Byrum had to make two 44-yard field goals in the final seconds, not just one (clever boy Urban Meyer stole a ploy by the Denver Broncos in Week 2 to beat the Oakland Raiders by calling a timeout a half-second before the kick, making the field goal kicker do it again after the timeout).
Meyer would be on the hot seat if Byrum would have missed the first field goal attempt , which wouldn't count due to the timeout, then made the second one. Alas, he made 'em both and sent Gator fans' jaws dropping in despair and instantly sent Tebow looking for a phonebooth, and a pair of glasses. Incidentally, Tuberville was seen after the game putting a green rock-like crystal into his right-front pants pocket before walking to the middle of the field and shaking hands with Meyer. Tubby, you devil, you.
And we thought you were done.

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