College football has begun. Sooners ... or later, somebody was bound to get hoit.
Not, hurt, as in ouch. But hoit. As in, AAAAAIIIEIEIGHHHH!!!!
According to police, 32-year-old Texas fan Brian Christopher Thomas walked into Henry Hudson's Pub on June 17 wearing a Longhorns T-shirt and quickly became the focus of football "trash talk" from another regular, 53-year-old Oklahoma fan Allen Michael Beckett. That's all the sides can agree on cuz after a few Natural Lights, it got ugly quick. Thomas' version is that as he got up to leave, Beckett grabbed his crotch, pulled him to the ground — still holding his crotch — with bar patrons jumping in to break it up — while Beckett was still holding his crotch — and finally getting pried apart — while Beckett was still holding his crotch. The exact quote from his lawyer was:"He could see both of his testicles hanging on the outside of his body." Thomas' attorney, Carl Hughes went on to say: "He was wearing a pair of white shorts, which made it that much worse."
It took more than 60 stitches to close the wound, and police interviewed Thomas at a nearby hospital emergency room. Of course, the Oklahoma fan says that the nuts of the Texas fan swang and attacked him, so go figure.
There have been scary bar fights since way back. Fortunately the Texas fan didn't get his nose bitten off like this bar patron. READ THE WHOLE STORY HERE.
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